All too well

Sometimes , recently I get

These thoughts

This punch through my chest

Maybe I need to leave ?

Give up

Turn the opposite way


Will I never be enough ?


are the devils claws still engaged around your head ?


I hate hearing her thoughts, but my mind convinces me I’m lost without them. That I have already lost you

It’s bullshit


Life is not like that.


Don’t let it

I know this

All to well

if I ever get around to living

The weight of the world is so heavy 

It’s as if the sky is weighing down on me 

Suffocating my dreams and hopes 

The brake lights match the sky 

And I’m thinking about my regrets 

this life will make you see things from every angle 

Especially when you thought you were immune from one 

Numb and compressed in thought 

I never have had this much dreaming in my 2 decades of life

Yet my motivation for dreams is at a all time low 

I can feel my weight in this moment 

What control do I have 

Sensitive spirit in a unresponsive path

107mph

i have no idea how i passed creative writing

it is so hard to write anything

so hard to get my thoughts onto paper

so real in my head

but when i try to get it out ......

maybe i forgot 

everything is so deep and locked inside me

i would rather stalk your social media and reassure myself you're not evil 

when i drank too much and don't even know when my head hit the pillow 

why didn't anyone call the police? ...

why didn't i? 

maybe i forgot

what was the last date justin went on? because i had to bail

and my soul will never let me forget that

i remember sitting in creative writing

in a hoodie

hoping

that something might change

maybe i forgot 

is it easier to be angry or sad?

because if it's sad, then i have always taken the easier way out

and i'm sitting 

in my kitchen

hoping

that something might change 

hoping

 i will forget

just so you know

hey, checking in

It’s been awhile 

J- I still check your tumblr, hoping a new post will appear.... 

It never does 

my goal is to look at everything you have ever posted

Every last one 

M- I still check your tumblr too. I don’t know why 

J- I want you to know I still listen to John Mayer religiously 

I don’t listen to bat manors at all. You seem to be in the same place as me. Weird wasn’t it?? Isnt it? We are always in the same place. Maybe that’s what brought us together. And what brought us apart 

T- you faded so quickly

what the hell does that mean 

Just checking in